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Divorce is a very complex process and nobody should get through it alone. Divorce discussions Actively engage in activities that will generate joy and/improve your self-esteem. “In the months during and after my divorce, I ran my first half marathon, traveled, enrolled in a wilderness basics course, backpacked, and went dancing at least once a month. I did these things even when I didn’t want to, even when I felt low and wanted to crawl into bed. Slowly, with time, I regained my confidence, self-respect, and self-love.”

The more you can organize your own financial documents, the more you will reduce your attorney fees and improve your chances of success. You are going to have to gather and organize a lot of information for your attorney or your case. A good way of organizing the information you find is a financial statement which can be used as a checklist. Many courts have a form financial statement available at the court clerk’s office and sometimes online. If you can obtain this form and fill it out, it will help you gather and organize your financial information. Give it to your lawyer at the first meeting to save time and expense.

Allow time to fully heal and reconnect with yourself before entering another relationship of any kind. The process of divorce is emotionally grueling. There is a lot to sift through and heal from. This is not the time to look to soothe oneself by entering another relationship. People make this mistake all the time. I personally went into a rebound relationship with someone who was sadder than I (like truly attracts like). It devastated me when it ended because I sought happiness and fulfillment outside of myself. This only leads to the same pattern to happen again. Learning this hard lesson pushed me forward and transformed me. I have a totally different mindset toward unconditional love and relationships now and I share this with my clients all the time.

If you and your spouse can work together to reach a fair settlement on most or all of the issues in your divorce (eg., child custody, child support, alimony, and property division), choosing mediation to resolve your divorce case may save thousands of dollars in legal fees and emotional aggravation. The mediation process involves a neutral third-party mediator (an experienced family law attorney trained in mediation) that meets with the divorcing couple and helps them reach an agreement on the issues in their divorce. Mediation is completely voluntary; the mediator will not act as a judge, or insist on any particular outcome or agreement.

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